Seated Within Being

From the Tympanum at St. Foy in Conques

Photograph by the author

I make an aim to be so deeply seated within my Being that even my least manifestation is rooted in it.

No matter how deeply I sense myself, I discover—in moments of opportunity—that there is always a yet deeper level of sensation, of physical and cellular awareness, that I have almost no connection to and rarely experience. 

Each time a new experience of this kind emerges, I’m surprised. I didn’t know that a yet deeper level— one which is even more alive—existed at all, let alone that I could be related to it and am generally lacking in that ability.

This sensation of self is primal; it lies beneath everything the mind thinks, and it begins before the place where the mind arises. It has, in addition to its rooted physical qualities, a character of intelligence; and it carrels within it a feeling of real love for Being; for this Being, the one which I’m gifted to participate in.

There is the possibility, if I’m seated within Being, to allow even the most superficial of reactions and identifications to run their course and play themselves out without entirely abandoning a sense that I am. 

That sense is wordless; it stands within, steadfast, like the fisherman when a large fish strikes his bait. 

The fisherman stands firm, allowing the fish to run, the line to spill itself out into the ocean, waiting for the precise moment when the fish finally pauses—exhausted, having used up its resources. 

At this point, the fisherman— who is exquisitely, organically attuned to the play of forces between Being and reaction—applies just the right amount of tension to the line. 

An exact relationship between the fish and the fisherman is re-established, by instinct—and the fish is brought back under control. Pulled back towards the inner center of gravity. 

My reactions can be like this; but only if I find this seat within Being, this place of gathered inner force which is superior to the mind.

Wishing the best for you on all days,

Lee

Lee van Laer is a Senior Editor at Parabola Magazine.