A secret Practice

 

If one practices long enough, one eventually receives a secret practice. 

Very little should be said of this, simply because the practice is secret. That is its essence; and even to mention it is a matter of gravity.

Behind every great teaching lies a secret, esoteric, inner practice that cannot be violated. It is born from time to time in the souls of men, and those who are vouchsafed with it must keep it secret. We only see the surface of it from the words that the various Great teachings leave us.

As to how this secret inner teaching functions, or what it may lead to, this is also secret. This is not to say that it is better or worse or indifferent to other ways or teachings; merely that it is close to God and cannot be touched by the things of the world. So it must be kept secret.

Even so, the secret teaching has effects, external manifestations, that bring understandings essential to coming closer to it. It will always remain secret, because its life is born in the hidden heart of the soul and could not ever actually be brought out into the coarse air of life, even if one had a wish or a will to do so. The things that belong to God are locked away so thoroughly that only the heart itself can come to them.

One thing that I have found is certain in discovering these truths is that one cannot keep the world and follow the truth. God can come much closer to a person; but in order to do that, one must increasingly leave the whole world behind in ways that human beings refuse to do. The Kingdom of Heaven demands a complete release of the world and all its things; one must put them behind oneself—as Christ said, “away with you, Satan.” (Matthew 4:1-11.) 

Satan is the world.

We cannot just decide to leave the world behind us; we must do it. God asks for everything; and to the extent that we give it, we receive everything in return. This is an ancient knowledge passed down through many generations of humanity, which has been deeply corrupted over time. Remember Abraham, who was asked to sacrifice his son. The son in this parable is everything that is born in us of the world.

The Kingdom of Heaven is filled with a glory and a perfection that transforms the things of this world; but that transformation is unattainable unless one surrenders all the things of the world first. One must go first and only to God in the heart, and nowhere else, casting aside each of the temptations that comes throughout the day.

These temptations are incredibly convincing. Today we see them in the addiction of human beings to politics and hatred; these are poisons that infect the soul, an illness much more dangerous than Covid 19. Even the best, those who think they are immune or superior, fall victim to it with so much ease that they can’t see it. Mankind is in the grip of a destructive force that consumes souls with a great appetite. Only by giving up this world entirely can any other world be gained.

We are surrounded in every instant by beauty and glory that would blind us if we turned our eyes directly on it; so perhaps it’s best, in some ways, that we can’t see it. But we need to somehow rediscover the fact that it is there; and we won’t have any opportunity to do that for as long as we cling to the world.

If one gathered people and told them truthfully of how to come closer to the heart, no one would listen. The ears cannot hear because the body does not receive. The eyes cannot see because the mind has already created its own image. When the tongue speaks, it is a slave and not a servant. Even what we taste and touch is a function of our lust and not a desire for God.

Many years ago I understood that the desire for God was the only thing real in me. In the midst of all my other desires, this one hunger stands like a tree in the desert, sinking its roots down into me and spreading its leaves towards the sun. 

The shearing of sheep takes many years; and I am hardly free of the devils that beset us all in our search for Being. Yet I have also learned that if we are steadfast and our care is earnest and honest, God will meet us halfway. 

From where we are, in relation to God, halfway is already all the way, because if God meets us halfway, our arms are already open, and He rushes into us with grace and forgiveness, even though he is the Father we scorned and the Mother we lost. 

Perhaps it’s dangerous to speak of such things; human beings are consumed with hatred and devils, and too often hate God first and before all their other hatreds, because this is what life does to them. So if I speak in this way, I will be hated by some. I already know this. 

Yet the hatred is not a hatred for me; it is a hatred for God and His Kingdom. The creatures of our personal underworld begin by thinking they are God, and hating God accordingly. This is how the ego works. 

We think that by calling it the ego, an innocent sounding, "scientific" term, that we are objective and can master it; but it was the ego itself that named itself ego in order to disguise its evil. It has always ever been thus with human beings: once we have put a safe name on it, we gaze upon the visage of our own damnation with equanimity.

Lest you doubt me, think of how Christ was crucified. 

He was not crucified by others; he is crucified by us. 

This is a lesson we turn our eyes away from, because we would rather love ourselves than love God and love Christ.

Ponder that for a while.

May you be well within today.

Lee

Lee van Laer is a Senior Editor at Parabola Magazine.