To Establish Inner Contact

Yesterday the question came up of how we come into touch with a higher energy… a finer rate of vibration… an experience of presence and Being.

Of course if anyone had the real answer to this, it would change everything. Yet despite the efforts (in the Gurdjieff work, that is) of thousands of people over many millions of hours, no clear answer has emerged. The exhortations… my own included… stand as testament; but even the best suggestions seem to consistently fall short of the mark.

Like others, I can speak only from my own experience. While there are points of contact between me and others, each case is unique, distinct and individual—and there are no guarantees.

Last night and the night before, as I listened to exchanges on this subject, again and again my thoughts—which were then and are now specifically grounded in this absolute sensation of Being—returned to the themes and understandings I have come to on my own, from my own work—not a reiteration of what others have said in the various books on the subject, but how it arises within and feels to me.

This may, perhaps, be idiosyncratic; yet I doubt it. There’s an objectivity to the arising and manifestation of any gravitationally sound sense and state of Being that does not permit of variation.

It is molecular; by this I mean that an organic sense of Being is grounded never in the thought, but always in the finest particles of Being that compose our state. This finer energy is not “above” us in the sense that one might think it is (and there are indeed such energies) but below us; and yet it encompasses a higher rate of vibration within me at a lower level than the one “I” am on.

This may sound like a paradox, but understanding it is essential to understanding both what organic sensation consists of, and how it supports the rest of our efforts towards Being.

The second thing that occurs to me is the manner in which intimacy comes into question here. If I don’t develop an instinctive intimacy directed (quite gently) at my Being and its parts—if I don’t cultivate a quiet, loving, intelligent relationship within myself— then I can’t begin to initiate the kind of inner contact that will attract what’s needed here.    

Warmly,

Lee

Announcing the publication of 

The Reconstruction of the Soul

The Reconstruction of the Soul is a wide-ranging investigation of symbolism in High and Late Medieval art. It includes detailed analyses of the Unicorn Tapestries at the Cluny Museum and the Cloisters in New York, as well as detailed examinations of the mysterious, erotic and bizarre symbolism in The Cathedral of St. Lazare in Autun.

Along the way, it traces the roots of Western esoteric art from Babylon to ancient Greece, revealing traditions that are still alive today, some 3000 or more years later.

The material is illustrated with photographs taken by the author on location in France and New York, as well as source material from various museums.

It will appeal to anyone interested in the symbolic transmission of the world's Western esoteric heritage.

All funds from your purchase of this book will go to support the translation of important historical documents related to the Gurdjieff tradition.

The author is currently at work on a second volume which will explore even earlier (!) influences on esoteric art and practice. Anticipated publication of this follow-up work will be late 2019.

Lee van Laer is a Senior Editor at Parabola Magazine.

This World Divided

All qualities are God’s.

We forget this so easily. I see every quality from one of two points of view: either it’s mine, or it belongs to someone else—to some material creature or being in the world outside me.

Now, if there is a finer rate of vibration available within me, ah, then—then I see how indelibly and utterly each thing I believe in actually belongs to God and no one else. But this is a rare state, and I’m only open to it through Grace. The rest of the time I’m a committed denizen of the world of creatures and oppositions. 

Yet all qualities belong to God and emanate from God; and it’s possible to become a participant in that understanding, such that every impression carries a sweetness within it that speaks of God alone. 

In this case the simplest of things is impossibly refined; and all of creation is suffused with a beautiful, exquisite sorrow that passes all understanding.  This is the essence, perhaps, of God Himself; and yet I understand it’s just a mere echo of His Being. 

Within this essence, all things are one; and yet I’m required over and over again to return to this world divided, from whence I venture forth again and again, according to the will and the whims of Grace, to meet God in His own domain, where I have no real right to tread.

November 9, 2018, Hangzhou, China

Wishing the best for you on this day,

Lee

Lee van Laer is a Senior Editor at Parabola Magazine.

The Perfection, part 3

Once under solar influences, one can’t escape their constant presence, which manifests independently of personal preference or inclination, and puts Being under an entirely new set of obligations and obediences which cannot be properly outlined in texts. 

The most important thing that can be said about all of this is that it provokes a progressive openness to receiving the particles of sorrow referred to in the second passage. 

This receiving is a three-centered activity which produces an exquisite anguish which will inevitably be understood as an essential form of inner work, an experience of intentional suffering, and a sacred obligation which touches the soul so directly that no other order of experience can possibly mimic it. 

Developing this capacity within Being is one of the most essential aims of Gurdjieff’s practice. This is often either profoundly misunderstood or not understood at all; and this aim itself is what sets Gurdjieff’s practice and teaching well apart from so-called “enlightenment” teachings and other spiritual practices. To come under solar influences causes, one might say, a different kind of inner enlightenment that's not only invisible to outsiders... there is no incentive to reveal it. It is a secret, personal inner work.

The adept has to work for themselves to develop and understand the capacities and consequences of this; and comparatives fall by the wayside in the process. One might point out there are no white gowns or halos to be had here.

I would only add this caution: interpreting these matters from any perspective of one’s ordinary day-to-day experience is a great mistake. Never assume anything; in these matters, that which understands, understands, and everything else is conjecture and foolishness.

Now we come to the meaning of the second passage, which is taken from The Holy Planet Purgatory. The passage explains, in a parenthetical way, the entire process of suffering that results from the development of the astral and mental bodies; yet the result of the experience of suffering on this level is an infrequent but real possibility of a visitation of God Himself.

This may seem ludicrous and entirely allegorical; yet what it refers to is a very real perception granted from time to time as a result of the action of intentional suffering on the order of solar emanations. This perception is what I call The Perfection; and it has had its precedents, for example, in Ibn Arabi’s description of The Reality, another word for God’s Presence. 

The Perfection is not a sighting of God; however, in the sense of God as an external entity; it is, rather, an inner vision of God, for God, through God’s eyes. 

That inner vision typically manifests as a three-centered, but profoundly feeling-saturated, perception of the world and Being which contains simultaneous understandings from all three centers that impress the absolute unity of all Being upon one’s inner parts.  This is what Gurdjieff describes as a vision which can “soothe” the sufferers in Purgatory. 

It's sublime... it's The Perfection.

As such, the descriptions of Purgatory are hardly allegorical or removed in distance from Earth; they are events and circumstances that may take place within life, right here, 

if and when our inner effort qualifies us for the experiences.

Such insight is truly hard won; and never guaranteed.  

Warmly,

Lee

Announcing the publication of 

The Reconstruction of the Soul

The Reconstruction of the Soul is a wide-ranging investigation of symbolism in High and Late Medieval art. It includes detailed analyses of the Unicorn Tapestries at the Cluny Museum and the Cloisters in New York, as well as detailed examinations of the mysterious, erotic and bizarre symbolism in The Cathedral of St. Lazare in Autun.

Along the way, it traces the roots of Western esoteric art from Babylon to ancient Greece, revealing traditions that are still alive today, some 3000 or more years later.

The material is illustrated with photographs taken by the author on location in France and New York, as well as source material from various museums.

It will appeal to anyone interested in the symbolic transmission of the world's Western esoteric heritage.

All funds from your purchase of this book will go to support the translation of important historical documents related to the Gurdjieff tradition.

The author is currently at work on a second volume which will explore even earlier (!) influences on esoteric art and practice. Anticipated publication of this follow-up work will be late 2019.

Lee van Laer is a Senior Editor at Parabola Magazine.

The Perfection, part 2

The meaning of the passage about remorse is a reference to what happens to an individual who develops deep enough levels of Organic Sensation of Being to open a pathway to the arrival and development of Organic Feeling. 

Organic Feeling can’t exist in the absence of Organic Sensation. Hence the great emphasis on understanding through direct experience the resolution of levels of inner vibration which lead to Organic Sensation. Years of work need to be put into this one aim, which ought to be the fundamental and only aim in one’s inner work until it is achieved. Organic Sensation is, within the inner circles of the Gurdjieff work, traditionally associated with the development of the astral body (Gurdjieff’s first higher being-body.) 

  Once an Organic Sensation of Being develops, and enough inner ground is prepared (Gurdjieff’s “coating of being-bodies”), Organic Feeling arrives. This faculty has an ability to sense and understand life in ways that are functionally and categorically impossible without its presence; there is no point in discussing it with those who haven’t experienced it firsthand. And of course there’s always the danger that folk who learn of it will misunderstand and think they have attained it in one way or another. The point is that this is one of those objective states Gurdjieff described in which there can be no argument between two who have truly experienced it, as to what it consists of. It only results in one experience; and it only has one “result.” This is what is meant by objective. It isn’t a state, furthermore, that can be exploited for personal gain in any way; it stands apart from such considerations because it is pure, that is, it has conclusively moved beyond the level of self-interest. Organic Feeling, if it were well understood (which it is not) is associated with the development of what Gurdjieff called the mental body, or second higher being-body.

When Organic Feeling arrives, a faculty is awakened which connects a human Being directly to planetary and solar influences. Gurdjieff spoke about and wrote of this kind of influence a good deal, but in this case (unlike the allegory of purgatory) the meaning is quite literal. 

Organic Sensation connects a human being to the influences of the Moon, which are (contrary to much misunderstanding in the Gurdjieff practice) absolutely essential  for the absorption of certain rooted astral emanations.

Organic Feeling connects a human Being to the emanations of the sun—not just through solioonensius, Gurdjieff’s word for the process (which refers, by the way, explicitly to solar flares and their action) but also to a wide range of emanated solar influences, which are constant and ongoing, such as the emanations from coronal holes in the sun, and various openings in the earth’s magnetic fields which allow greater or lesser amounts of solar emanations to influence one’s Being. 

And there is an important key to this hidden teaching: the section of the book within which it is introduced. The passage is a teaching from Ashiata Shiemash, whose name means “ray of light from the sun.” Coming under the influences of his teaching actualy means “coming under solar influences.” This is meant to be understood as an actual physical event, whereby the emanations of the sun tangibly and materially begin to affect the organism.

Part 3 of this series will be published on Dec. 6.

Warmly,

Lee

Announcing the publication of 

The Reconstruction of the Soul

The Reconstruction of the Soul is a wide-ranging investigation of symbolism in High and Late Medieval art. It includes detailed analyses of the Unicorn Tapestries at the Cluny Museum and the Cloisters in New York, as well as detailed examinations of the mysterious, erotic and bizarre symbolism in The Cathedral of St. Lazare in Autun.

Along the way, it traces the roots of Western esoteric art from Babylon to ancient Greece, revealing traditions that are still alive today, some 3000 or more years later.

The material is illustrated with photographs taken by the author on location in France and New York, as well as source material from various museums.

It will appeal to anyone interested in the symbolic transmission of the world's Western esoteric heritage.

All funds from your purchase of this book will go to support the translation of important historical documents related to the Gurdjieff tradition.

The author is currently at work on a second volume which will explore even earlier (!) influences on esoteric art and practice. Anticipated publication of this follow-up work will be late 2019.

Lee van Laer is a Senior Editor at Parabola Magazine.

The Perfection, part 1

“The earthly, which is the outermost level of the divine design, brings about completion, so that the inner things, which are heavenly and spiritual, stand firmly on it the way a house stands on its foundation.”

—Emmanuel Swedenborg, The Last Judgment

“In any case, you must first of all be told that this same holy planet, which is called Purgatory, is for the whole of our Great Universe, as it were, the heart and place of concentration of all the completing results of the pulsation of everything that functions and exists in the Universe. 

“Our COMMON-FATHER-CREATOR-ENDLESSNESS appears there so often only because this holy planet is the place of the existence of the, in the highest degree, unfortunate ‘higher-being- bodies’, who obtained their coating on various planets of the whole of our Great Universe. 

“The ‘higher-being-bodies’ who have already merited to dwell on this holy planet, suffer, maybe, as much as anybody in the whole of our Great Universe. 

“In view of this, our ALL-LOVING, ENDLESSLY-MERCIFUL and ABSOLUTELY-JUST CREATOR-ENDLESSNESS, having no other possibility of helping these unfortunate ‘higher-being-bodies’ with anything, often appears there so that by these appearances of HIS HE may soothe them, if only a little, in their terrible inevitable state of inexpressible anguish. 

—G. I. Gurdjieff, Beelzebub’s Tales to His Grandson, The Holy Planet Purgatory 

In order to understand the above passage, one first needs to consider the below text, which is well known to most readers of Gurdjieff’s work:

‘The factors for the being-impulse conscience arise in the presences of the three-brained beings from the localization of the particles of the “emanations-of-the-sorrow” of our OMNI-LOVING AND LONG-SUFFERING-ENDLESS-CREATOR; that is why the source of the manifestation of genuine conscience in three-centered beings is sometimes called the REPRESENTATIVE OF THE CREATOR.

“ ‘And this sorrow is formed in our ALL-MAINTAINING COMMON FATHER from the struggle constantly proceeding in the Universe between joy and sorrow.’

“And he then also further said:

“ ‘In all three-brained beings of the whole of our Universe without exception, among whom are also we men, owing to the data crystallized in our common presences for engendering in us the Divine impulse of conscience, “the-whole-of-us” and the whole of our essence, are, and must be, already in our foundation, only suffering.

“ ‘And they must be suffering, because the completed actualizing of the manifestation of such a being-impulse in us can proceed only from the constant struggle of two quite opposite what are called “complexes-of-the-functioning” of those two sources which are of quite opposite origin, namely, between the processes of the functioning of our planetary body itself and the parallel functionings arising progressively from the coating and perfecting of our higher being-bodies within this planetary body of ours, which functionings in their totality actualize every kind of Reason in the three-centered beings.

—G.I. Gurdjieff, from “The Organization for Man's Existence Created by the Very Saintly Ashiata Sheimash:"

Gurdjieff’s writings work on many levels; some are literary, some are literal, some are allegorical, some are mythological, and some are even outright fictional. Yet these two passages covertly present two essential processes that human beings ought to undergo in their work to develop spiritual Being; and while he ultimately places them in a “location” called The Holy Planet Purgatory, the actual “location” they take place in, if rightly understood, is within the Being of an individual who works.

The Holy Planet Purgatory, in other words, is just as much a place within man or woman as is the Kingdom of Heaven. 

Part 2 of this series will be published on Dec. 3.

Warmly,

Lee

Announcing the publication of 

The Reconstruction of the Soul

The Reconstruction of the Soul is a wide-ranging investigation of symbolism in High and Late Medieval art. It includes detailed analyses of the Unicorn Tapestries at the Cluny Museum and the Cloisters in New York, as well as detailed examinations of the mysterious, erotic and bizarre symbolism in The Cathedral of St. Lazare in Autun.

Along the way, it traces the roots of Western esoteric art from Babylon to ancient Greece, revealing traditions that are still alive today, some 3000 or more years later.

The material is illustrated with photographs taken by the author on location in France and New York, as well as source material from various museums.

It will appeal to anyone interested in the symbolic transmission of the world's Western esoteric heritage.

All funds from your purchase of this book will go to support the translation of important historical documents related to the Gurdjieff tradition.

The author is currently at work on a second volume which will explore even earlier (!) influences on esoteric art and practice. Anticipated publication of this follow-up work will be late 2019.

Lee van Laer is a Senior Editor at Parabola Magazine.

An Inner Ethic

Semipalmated Sandpipers, Hudson River, September 2108.

September 24.

Attempting to digest life as it arrives.

I’m not sure we appreciate just how much of life needs to be lived quite simply, inwardly, awaiting the arrival of life itself, from within. It’s a quiet place; a stillness that receives. All of my outwardness settles down into a gravity that has the capacity to resist its distractions.

It’s late September, and at this time of year the Sorrow always begins to flow into Being more powerfully. Time to digest the results and fruits of one’s labors; and time, also, to attempt to comprehend the essential failures, over the course of a lifetime, to meet the inner ethical demands of one’s life.

There’s a deep remorse that enters being from below—and it enters from below, even though it is a higher energy sent by a higher power than me. God can enter the house through the basement, it turns out, just as easily as He can enter through the roof. I forget this; yet God dwells with ease in all of this house I call Being. His Divine Radiance is not limited to the heavens; or, rather, it is within our inner heavens that His radiance shines most brightly, and most unexpectedly.

As a result of this Presence, there’s an inner ethic that slowly grows within Being; and it is a rooted thing, apart from myself, an ethic that draws its intelligence not just from the clouds and the sun and the rain of heaven—which are real— but from the very soil of Being itself. It penetrates; it permeates, it informs. There’s no real love present in me without the foundation of this inner ethic.

Warmly,

Lee

Announcing the publication of 

The Reconstruction of the Soul

The Reconstruction of the Soul is a wide-ranging investigation of symbolism in High and Late Medieval art. It includes detailed analyses of the Unicorn Tapestries at the Cluny Museum and the Cloisters in New York, as well as detailed examinations of the mysterious, erotic and bizarre symbolism in The Cathedral of St. Lazare in Autun.

Along the way, it traces the roots of Western esoteric art from Babylon to ancient Greece, revealing traditions that are still alive today, some 3000 or more years later.

The material is illustrated with photographs taken by the author on location in France and New York, as well as source material from various museums.

It will appeal to anyone interested in the symbolic transmission of the world's Western esoteric heritage.

All funds from your purchase of this book will go to support the translation of important historical documents related to the Gurdjieff tradition.

The author is currently at work on a second volume which will explore even earlier (!) influences on esoteric art and practice. Anticipated publication of this follow-up work will be late 2019.

Lee van Laer is a Senior Editor at Parabola Magazine.

Being for others

 As I said in the last post, it's not enough for me to just be for myself. 

When I say, I wish to be from my ordinary parts, in a more or less ordinary (though possibly heartfelt and sincere) way, I'm more or less wishing for myself... and this action, while it may seem important (especially from my selfish point of view) isn’t enough. It hasn’t been carefully examined; and its consequences in terms of the direction my inner work takes are perhaps not properly understood.

 I don’t, in the end, wish to be for myself at all. That isn't the real point of Being. There are two essential points of Being that are forgotten on this end of the prayer, this wish for myself. That is that the wish for myself is only a beginning place, that leads me to the two much greater wishes.

The first greater wish is the wish to be on behalf of others.

 The second greater wish, which is the greatest wish, is the wish to be on behalf of God.

 If I wish to be for myself, and I keep chanting this like a mantra, deflecting back to the self-referential struggles of my own—and how this, that, and the other thing aren’t working properly in me—I may miss these other two actions, which are essential in terms of inner development.

 The idea of intentional suffering is specifically meant to help us understand the second greater wish, the wish to be on behalf of others. In particular, this wish to be on behalf of others must be an emotional wish — not just a material one, in which I want to support others materially, which is the least of the kinds of support other human beings need in the end — it is a wish to support them as other beings emotionally. And let’s face it, almost all of our efforts to support others materially run up on the rocks of the simple fact that we're rather poor at this. 

It's not enough to just feed the body; one must also feed the soul.

 Yet we find ourselves today in a society that thinks more, and harder, about feeding the body (whatever kind of food it is, whether it's bread to eat or internet pornography) than it thinks about anything else. We spend very little time considering how to feed the soul; and technological materialism is making all of mankind forget what it means to have Being for others, rather than just myself.

 The whole point of developing a wholeness of Being is that this particular understanding grows stronger legs as a result of it. I slowly learn to support others more through love than ego; more through care than self interest. This is an interesting and difficult task, because my overall responsibilities require that I maintain both ego and self interest in the process; with one important difference. 

That difference is that ego and self interest must be put into the service of myself in order that I may better serve others.

This piece of the inner landscape is complex and multidimensional. It is inhabited out of sight, and best not to talk about it with others; yet those who understand what I speak of here will equally understand how important it is to take an active, intelligent, and compassionate attitude that extends from this seed-of-a-beginning in myself into my relationship with others...

and then into the realm of a relationship with God.

Oh, my goodness. If I truly see myself, what a pauper I am in this action. I don’t perform my tasks or services well at all. 

It reminds me well of brother Lawrence, who saw continual deficiencies and understood that only God could rectify them.

Warmly,


Lee

Announcing the publication of 

The Reconstruction of the Soul

The Reconstruction of the Soul is a wide-ranging investigation of symbolism in High and Late Medieval art. It includes detailed analyses of the Unicorn Tapestries at the Cluny Museum and the Cloisters in New York, as well as detailed examinations of the mysterious, erotic and bizarre symbolism in The Cathedral of St. Lazare in Autun.

Along the way, it traces the roots of Western esoteric art from Babylon to ancient Greece, revealing traditions that are still alive today, some 3000 or more years later.

The material is illustrated with photographs taken by the author on location in France and New York, as well as source material from various museums.

It will appeal to anyone interested in the symbolic transmission of the world's Western esoteric heritage.

All funds from your purchase of this book will go to support the translation of important historical documents related to the Gurdjieff tradition.

The author is currently at work on a second volume which will explore even earlier (!) influences on esoteric art and practice. Anticipated publication of this follow-up work will be late 2019.

Lee van Laer is a Senior Editor at Parabola Magazine.

The Reconstruction of the Soul

Announcing the publication of 

The Reconstruction of the Soul

The Reconstruction of the Soul is a wide-ranging investigation of symbolism in High and Late Medieval art. It includes detailed analyses of the Unicorn Tapestries at the Cluny Museum and the Cloisters in New York, as well as detailed examinations of the mysterious, erotic and bizarre symbolism in The Cathedral of St. Lazare in Autun.

Along the way, it traces the roots of Western esoteric art from Babylon to ancient Greece, revealing traditions that are still alive today, some 3000 or more years later.

The material is illustrated with photographs taken by the author on location in France and New York, as well as source material from various museums.

It will appeal to anyone interested in the symbolic transmission of the world's Western esoteric heritage.

All funds from your purchase of this book will go to support the translation of important historical documents related to the Gurdjieff tradition.

The author is currently at work on a second volume which will explore even earlier (!) influences on esoteric art and practice. Anticipated publication of this follow-up work will be late 2019.

warmly,

Lee

Lee van Laer is a Senior Editor at Parabola Magazine.

A wholeness of being

 Gurdjieff frequently discussed how important it is to have a single “I.”

 I would suggest a different phrase. 

What I seek in myself is what I’d call a Wholeness of Being.

 I bring this up with a sense of irony about using the word “I” at all; whether to refer to my own opinions and ideas on the subject (and, of course, my own direct experience) or to refer to the specific question of ego and individuality.

 I’ve been working, as it happens, on a series of writings about the “wave of Being;” and in doing so, I was required to discuss the question of identity and what it consists of with my friend Paul. Paul has an incisive mind on these matters, so one cannot discuss things of this nature lightly with him; and the considerations provoked a range of questions about what identity is, where it comes from, and what it means.

 Those questions are far from resolved. Yet all of them center around intellectual analysis, and what I am interested in this morning is a wholeness of being that arises organically. This wholeness of being is directly related to what I call the molecular sense of being; yet the molecular sense of Being alone is not enough to truly understand Being as it exists as an entity. 

 There are a lot of lofty ways to approach this — we are all part of one great whole, everything is sacred, and so on. It’s all too easy to speak mostly true words like this, and even more so to indulge in sincere but mostly sentimental relationships with the ideas they present. Most of New Age philosophy and a great deal of “feel – happy” spiritual practice — which has been adopted by many formerly serious institutions such as Buddhism and Christianity — relies on the ease of these ideas, how easy they are to market and sell, how easy it is to send important when saying them, how easy it is to sign on because they're saying warm fuzzy things we like to hear.

 All of that's fine, but the organic sense of being and wholeness of being are grounded in a fundamentally different approach to life, which involves identity as a three-centered action within the inner state of a man or woman. I sometimes call this the Reconstruction of the Soul — and I capitalize that simply because a forthcoming book of mine discusses this at great length in the context of medieval art history. 

Yet philosophy, new age pondering, and medieval art history do not do the subject justice, because it isn't a philosophy.  It's an inner action that must take place within me now.

 This action reminds me quite clearly and precisely, down to the very marrow of my bones, right in this instant, that I don’t know who I am or where I am. I don’t know what will come next. This is a conscious and sensational (grounded in sensation) action that provokes a feeling of remorse and sorrow which must be pondered using the intellectual presence I bring to bear on the moment. 

These three factors combined within me to leave me with a sense of immediate mystery — not cosmological mystery related to how vast everything is and how tiny I am, and so on, but an existential mystery related to the act of existence right in this moment, as it is.

 While this action is measured through individuality, it cannot be completed through it. The word individuality itself carries contradictions, because on the one hand it means “undivided,” and on the other hand it means, more or less, “separated from others.” The ironies here are implicit, because in the first place, I am myself divided into many parts, no matter how we add things up and no matter how whole my being is, and in the second place, I am not separate from others — I cannot exist without the community that I inhabit. My ego just causes me to think I am.

 If the irony is not just implicit, but also explicit — as the above makes apparent — how do I resolve that?

 This wholeness of Being skirts the question of ego, individuality, and even the word “I” itself. It reminds me of the prayer I've been working on for many years:  There is no “I”, there is only truth. The way to the truth is through the heart.  

No one can claim to penetrate the truth of this prayer in its entirety; and indeed, I am not even close. Yet I remind myself of it every morning. 

I live within an existence that is composed essentially, without compromise, of truth. 

As I've said lately to many friends in regard to this matter, “ life arises naturally.” We need only show up and be there for it; if we inhabit the natural arising of life, gently and responsibly, with some attention and love, we can naturally fulfill our being responsibilities without tension. Of course this is an idealized version of it; we are reactive creatures, no matter what we do, and we'll have to deal with that as well. Yet this wholeness of Being, this molecular sensation and a sober emotional attitude — characterized by remorse of conscience and an intention to suffer on behalf not only of myself, but more especially of others — is a fundamental place from which life can be inhabited.

 While I respect the long-standing tradition of Gurdjieff’s prayer, “I wish to be,” I find it limiting. It weirdly sounds like Being is all about me; and nothing could really be further from the truth.  

It has a grain of truth in it, to be sure, but it is not enough to just wish to be for myself.

Warmly,

Lee

Lee van Laer is a Senior Editor at Parabola Magazine.