Friday, October 17, 2014
That is to say, there is an ordinary sensation that arises that is tangible to the mind. The mind perceives it; and the mind sees it as existing outside the mind, that is, it is owned by the mind, and is not understood as its own event and its own action.
This kind of "mind-sensation" is what all of our senses bring to us. We have a wide variety of sensations in us; they are biological. There is a sensation of organs, such as hunger in the stomach; the sensation of pain in the foot, of movement in the arm, the sensation of touch and the skin, hot and cold, of seeing things and hearing things, and so on. But these are sensations that take place on this level, and they are mechanical biological functions, not an active awareness of sensation. The active awareness sensation begins rooted deep in the body, down in the cells, and it is no exaggeration to say that a real, a living, sensation extends to every cell such that every cell speaks of its own being within the context of life itself. In a certain way the whole point of this sensation is that it contacts us from a lower level — and that is a critical understanding, because if we do not have contact with this lower level, it shuts off contact with any higher levels. We are a system that connects levels; not a level unto ourselves.
To be sure, the overall effectiveness of living sensation waxes and wanes according to the inner structure and energy levels of the organic body; but this kind of sensation is like a gentle fire that burns forever down at the bottom of life, where it gives warmth to everything that exists. The origin of life and being are connected to this sensation; and it is not the same as the biological sensations we are accustomed to. Merely developing an awareness of those sensations, a greater attention to them, is not at all enough. It is quite different than the kind of sensation that Gurdjieff and de Salzmann asked us to understand.
Most of the attention exercises, and almost all of the attention that goes in the sensation, end up contacting this biological sensation, rather than living sensation of Being; whereas the sensation that ought to arrive is completely different than that in the end. This is the danger of exercises. One can do sensation exercises for decades and even become an adept at them and still not understand what the sensation of the organic sense of being consists of. This is, unfortunately, "normal."
Allowing the mind to conceive of this from any ordinary point of view and use its ordinary understanding to touch the question is ultimately useless. One has to open to a new kind of sensation, a completely different sensation, that creates an inner revolution in terms of awareness — a revolution of inner energy, not the action of thinking about inner energy.
Real inner energy thinks on its own and for itself — not because of me, and not on behalf of me. This particular kind of sensation which gives rise to organic being is a part of that revolution; in fact, as I said before and have said many times, it is the roots of the revolution, the place where everything begins.
In a certain sense, one has to begin by dismissing everything one thinks one knows about sensation, and starting over. One has to know sensation from sensation itself; that is, sensation must become the knowing—
which balances the knowing of the mind in an entirely new way.